Rasmenia, Author at Rasmenian Detritus – Page 14 of 42

The Misanthropic Heathens & the Quest for Christmas Magic

December 28, 2011November 30, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

“Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.” - Charles M. Schulz“What kind of Christmas present would Jesus ask Santa for?” - Salman Rushdie, Fury*When I was a tiny, brand-new person, I knew what it felt like to be overwhelmed by music, cookies & twinkling lights. I knew the absolute joy that can only come from a tiny, brand-new person's sense of wonder when presented with stories & images of magical elves, animals & places.I knew Christmas magic. It was nothing less than magic.Like any kid, I got excited about presents. But, wasn't the anticipation & surprise always more fun than the actual object wrapped up inside all of that pretty paper?I consider myself lucky that for the first few years of my life, I had grandparents who I always spent the holiday with & that they got more excited about Christmas than anyone I've ever met since. There was always an enormous tree, standing upon a big...

There Is Nothing More

December 16, 2011 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

“Do I fear death? No, I am not afraid of being dead because there's nothing to be afraid of, I won't know it. I fear dying, of dying I feel a sense of waste about it and I fear a sordid death, where I am incapacitated or imbecilic at the end which isn't something to be afraid of, it's something to be terrified of.”"The only position that leaves me with no cognitive dissonance is atheism. It is not a creed. Death is certain, replacing both the siren-song of Paradise and the dread of Hell. Life on this earth, with all its mystery and beauty and pain, is then to be lived far more intensely: we stumble and get up, we are sad, confident, insecure, feel loneliness and joy and love. There is nothing more; but I want nothing more.""So far, I have decided to take whatever my disease can throw at me, and to stay combative even while taking the...

Anti-Peanut Butterism. Yes. It’s a Thing.

December 2, 2011 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

“Man can not live by bread alone ... he must have peanut butter.” - Bill Cosby“I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.” - Janet Evanovich“Peanut butter is the paté of childhood.” - Florence Fabricant*I've heard a lot of people say that the French hate Americans. Before I moved to France, a few people asked me, "You sure you want to move there? They hate us in France."After I moved here, a couple of people asked about me when talking with my relatives, or mutual friends. "What's she doing over there? Doesn't she know that French people hate Americans?"I'm happy to tell you that this is complete bullshit. These are the concerns of the gullible, the ignorant & those who have never set foot on European soil. I've been here for 6...

Flowers for Rasmenia

November 16, 2011November 30, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

All right, then... it's been almost 6 months since we moved into this house and lost the luxury of a home Internet connection. Now we finally have it again and I can actually refer to an Internet connection at home as a luxury, rather than a necessity.Okay, maybe I really don't believe that. I NEED the Internet. I absolutely need an endless supply of baby animal videos and 10 different columns of nonstop gibberish on Twitter. I require endless stream of commentary on current events to keep me up-to-date and a steady torrent of jingoist YouTube videos on my Facebook news feed to remind me to be patriotic. I MUST have IMDB handy every time I'm watching a movie and can't remember where I've seen that actor's face before. I fucking NEED Wikipedia to be there every time I have the slightest question about every trivial event or mysterious fruit I happen upon in the produce section.These things are IMPORTANT.Well,...

Displaced & Disconnected

June 23, 2011November 23, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

We had it all planned out: look at the houses, choose one, buy it, then move into it. Easy enough. Sort of. Olivier & I had both been through the bullshit & hassles of home buying before, though this was the first time we'd be trudging through the muck together.Finding the house took a couple of months of searching. We got up early every weekend to drive an hour away & wandered through some very cold, damp & creepy houses. Oh... & there was that incident involving my urine. Then, some time during the month of February, we found our house.So, we started making plans: we'd sign the papers closing the sale of the house on May 27th. We'd move in on May 30th, since there was a family scheduled to move into our apartment on the 31st."Damn," I said. "That's cutting it awfully close."Hell, of course it was too fucking close. You know what they say about how the...

Hydra Island & the Harbor Hobo

May 12, 2011December 2, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

The first problem we had was finding our boat. We found the harbor. We had two tickets to Hydra island, but couldn't find any information on which boat was which and what went where. We found a crusty old sailor who mumbled something at us in Greek and waved us away.We walked a bit farther along the harbor and came across a friendly old guy with white hair, big white eyebrows and skin like rawhide. He offered to help, took a look at our tickets and showed us which boat to take. When he picked up on Olivier's French accent, he switched from English to French."French is better," he said. "It makes more sense, the grammar. Je mange, tu manges, nous mangeons... okay. That's grammar. English has no grammar. The dogs you see here in the streets, even they speak English." We had a laugh and chatted for a few minutes. "The boat will be here soon." He pointed to...