France – Page 4 of 14 – Rasmenian Detritus

Awkward Adventures in the Socialized Healthcare of France

August 30, 2012November 23, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

Before I even get started, let me warn you that if you get squeamish when it comes to chatter about doctors poking around in lady bits, then this post will not interest, amuse or inform you in any way. You'll likely be too preoccupied with all of your squeamishing to to focus on reading, so... off you go while the rest of us talk.Like a great many people, I've never cared much for going to the doctor. Any doctor. For anything. I'm not afraid of doctors, but in the past, I usually had to feel as though I were at risk of coughing up my aorta, or maybe shitting out a spleen or several yards of intestines. Even when I had broken bones, I was reluctant. I didn't mind carrying my broken wrist with my good arm if the alternative was sitting in the emergency room. A busted eye socket... well, I didn't even go to the hospital. Luckily, I...

Star Wars Burgers & the Everlasting Star Cheese

April 6, 2012 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

A couple of months ago, I got a few messages from friends back home in the States about this:Oh... & also, this:For a few days, the Internet was abuzz with various articles about the Star Wars burgers in France & Belgium. Not surprisingly, those articles were riddled with comments from all of the very smart Americans who made it their mission to correct the spelling of "Dark Vador." Even the very smart writers at Huffington Post were confused as to why the name was "misspelled."To avoid that here - & to prevent me from having to make fun of you - let's clear it up right away & make it known that the character's name in France is Dark Vador. Okay? Got it? (This translation prevents his name from being pronounced like "Dart Vah-day.")Now, then... moving on. As soon as Olivier & I found out about these, we knew we had to give them a try. We don't eat at...

Don’t Call Me a Foodie

February 22, 2012 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

“You can't just eat good food. You've got to talk about it too. And you've got to talk about it to somebody who understands that kind of food.” ― Kurt Vonnegut“Watch a French housewife as she makes her way slowly along the loaded stalls… searching for the peak of ripeness and flavor… What you are seeing is a true artist at work, patiently assembling all the materials of her craft, just as the painter squeezes oil colors onto his palette ready to create a masterpiece.” ― Keith Floyd“Americans are just beginning to regard food the way the French always have. Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.” ― Art Buchwald*A while ago, someone read several posts on this blog & said to me, "I really enjoyed reading through all of your food posts. I'm a big foodie, like you."Uh... what? Like me? Me? A foodie?No.I like to eat, sure. I love...

I Don’t Live in Paris

February 3, 2012November 24, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

I live in France. I don't live in Paris. I used to live in Paris.People sometimes ask me about something going on in Paris. I can only answer with, "Um... I don't really know the details about that. I don't live in Paris."Occasionally, I'll be asked, "So, how're things in Paris?""Well, fine as far as I know. But, I can only guess because... I don't live in Paris."A little over 6 years ago, I stepped off a plane at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris. Olivier was still my husband-to-be & I was not yet Madame Massoud. He fetched me & my Cat at the airport, along with all the possessions I could bring along with me.He took us home, to his apartment in Montmartre. All of you who are either already familiar with the area, or who are Francophile Amelie geeks, know that Montmartre is located in the 18th arrondissement of Paris. For the rest of you, here's a...

Anti-Peanut Butterism. Yes. It’s a Thing.

December 2, 2011 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

“Man can not live by bread alone ... he must have peanut butter.” - Bill Cosby“I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.” - Janet Evanovich“Peanut butter is the paté of childhood.” - Florence Fabricant*I've heard a lot of people say that the French hate Americans. Before I moved to France, a few people asked me, "You sure you want to move there? They hate us in France."After I moved here, a couple of people asked about me when talking with my relatives, or mutual friends. "What's she doing over there? Doesn't she know that French people hate Americans?"I'm happy to tell you that this is complete bullshit. These are the concerns of the gullible, the ignorant & those who have never set foot on European soil. I've been here for 6...

House Hunting, Humidity & Humiliation

February 23, 2011November 30, 2020 by Rasmenia Comment Closed

"Never make a decision when you need to pee." -Leonard Cohen * The GPS on the dashboard said we were still 20 minutes away from Épernon. This Saturday morning was the fourth Saturday morning in a row in which Olivier and I had woken at 6am to make the hour-long drive to Épernon or Rambouillet. Maybe it was the fifth Saturday. I've lost track. Four or five Saturdays in a row. Rising early. Spending the day in our car, or in the car of another real estate agent. We've met five of those, now. Or maybe six. I don't remember. Don't ask me how many houses we've wandered in and out of in an effort to find one that we can fall in love with. I'd say about twenty. Twenty houses. Maybe thirty. I can't recall. Anyway... where was I? Oh, right. The dashboard. The GPS. 20 minutes. I looked over at Olivier. "Um... I have to pee," I said. "Didn't you just go before we left the house?" "Yeah. But that...