Flirtation & Fashion Shows in the Produce Section

Flirtation & Fashion Shows in the Produce Section

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
I was having lunch with a couple of French friends when the subject of grocery shopping came up.  One might expect that walking into a store, looking for food & paying for it would basically be the same from one place to another.Basically, that's true.  Basically.What surprised them was when I mentioned the fact that on occasion, an American shopper might be hit on in the grocery store.  Of course, we all know that the frozen food aisle isn't exactly ladies' night with half off Tequila shooters, but it does happen.  There's even a movie about it, though I won't be surprised if you haven't seen it.I told my friends about an incident that took place about 10 years ago.  I was in the soup aisle of King Soopers trying to make a serious decision between Progresso & Wolfgang Puck.  Unshowered, in dirty sweatpants & T-shirt, all I cared about at that moment was the can of soup that would...
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Souricide. It’s Possible That I’m Easily Amused.

Souricide. It’s Possible That I’m Easily Amused.

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
We pulled into the parking lot of the Intermarché. Olivier jumped out of the car while I grabbed the magic token that we use to unchain a shopping cart.Yeah, chains. Magic tokens. See, the carts are all chained together at the grocery stores in France. You need to have a Euro coin or a magic plastic token to stick in a little slot, thus releasing the chain and granting you shopping cart privileges.You can't get your coin back until you chain it up again, so it kind of sucks as far as stealing a shopping cart goes. You know, because sometimes you need one to pull jackass stunts and pranks.So, we walked around with our rented shopping cart and began tossing shit into it. Handing the list back & forth, neither one of us paying attention to what the other is putting in there. We go stand in one of the two very long lines. It's almost 7pm. The store's about...
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The IKEA Nesting Instinct

The IKEA Nesting Instinct

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
"And I wasn't the only slave to my nesting instinct. The people I know who used to sit in the bathroom with pornography, now they sit in the bathroom with their IKEA furniture catalogue." ~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club, Chapter 5"You buy furniture. You tell yourself, this is the last sofa I will ever need in my life. Buy the sofa, then for a couple years you're satisfied that no matter what goes wrong, at least you've got your sofa issue handled. Then the right set of dishes. Then the perfect bed. The drapes. The rug. Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you." ~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club, Chapter 5~I feel as though I've committed some sort of blasphemy. I had done so well, selling, giving, and throwing away most of my material possessions - all the while, reminding myself that, "the things you own end up owning you."It was...
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